Not as we expect…

“I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance – waiting for the bathroom.” – Bob Hope

Waiting. We’re all waiting for something. Many of us are feeling the middle of a specific timetable. When we look at our experiences in life, much of it is spent between places where we know, want, need, desire and hope for. Waiting can be one of the most difficult things we face in our lives. We come face to face with powerlessness in hanging on for possibility. We hatch plans of action; meticulously constructing paths to bring about what we desire. We look for answers and insights into situations we do not understand. We get caught up in the type of busyness which fills our times with productivity, yet accomplishes very little toward hastening the next step: Activity occupying our minutes, yet drowning out the solitude of our waiting. It gives us a feeling of direction when we are lost for words, but the end is distraction from our circumstances which do not evade our experience of the middle; where we are still waiting.

Waiting. We’re all waiting for something; a job, a spouse, a promotion, a friend to reach out, a phone call, healing, justice, provision, closure, an answer… most of us find ourselves waiting for something and caught in the middle. As we wait we are stretched, we get overwhelmed, we know anxiety and we feel weary. Some people chase after power philosophies or spiritual attuning seminars; hearing the words of Tony Robbins saying things like, “I’ve continued to recognize the power individuals have to change virtually anything and everything in their lives in an instant. I’ve learned that the resources we need to turn our dreams into reality are within us, merely waiting for the day when we decide to wake up and claim our birthright.” Though one must note in his life, even he did not miraculously and instantly turn his life around this way. In his life, there is waiting. As we wait we do come face to face with many things. We interact with our concept of truth, our definition of purpose, who we are, what is really important and where we place our hope. For many, finding these truths can encapsulate a life long search. The search can be extensive as we look inward or look to the political, the motivational, the spiritual and the powerful; all of the time looking for purpose and hope to be illuminated as we wait. We hope to discover what is lasting; what truly matters. We can become weary of waiting and focus our attention on things to distract us from what is directly in front of us. In waiting we learn momentary realities about what we desire and we come to confront our true needs. The longer we wait, we are forced to focus past the temporal, the misunderstood and the salacious, so that we can find the blessing through the suffering and see the truth that transcends the time.

There is a pivotal idea which the Lord imparts to his people through the ages: Not as we expect, but as God wills. Abraham and Sarah bearing a son in their 90’s, Joseph going from the pit to the palace to reunion with his family, the red sea parting, manna from heaven, David slaying Goliath, the Messiah coming to Israel… not as they expected, but as God willed. Jesus’ miracles, parables and love – not as they expected, but as God willed. The incarnate Lord, submitting to death on the cross to cover our sins before the Father – not as we expected, but as God willed. This is our path in waiting; not as we expect, but as God wills. In this Easter season we come face to face with the fulfillment of hope in waiting in this manner. We find ourselves in the middle and the momentary, in the blessing and the suffering, in the truth and the timing, and in the provision and revelation of God’s plan interacting with humanity. We must come to understand our experiences in waiting in light of God’s truth. If we wait, entrenched in our expectation and entitlement, looking inward to our self, our power and our control; we risk the same fate of the Israelites not seeing the Messiah in Christ – seeing only what we expect, and forming a god whose will serves our desires, our structures and our limited vision of the future. We will search for answers in overthrowing our oppression, justifying our rights, verifying our ambitions. We will not see the truth which saves us from our self, which redeems us from an eternally focused reality and restores our hearts and minds to the Lord God Almighty. In our waiting, we learn to depend not on what we expect, but what God wills.

The disciples were amidst this predicament on one such a day. They were waiting. In disbelief, their plans for a future had been shattered by the crucifixion of their Master. What must that Saturday been like? I assume it was the type of hand-wringing, anxious, head shaking, worrisome experience which we know well from our own in times of waiting. A loss for words, direction, desire and understanding; they were suffering. These were the men who had seen miracles heal the blind, the lame and the dead, parables which changed viewpoints, showing the heart of the Sovereign Lord and the love covered interaction of the Son of God caring for his creation with his hands, his words and his touch. Yet on this Saturday, they did not see that it was not the healing miracles, the parables or the love which would ultimately save mankind from sin; it was his suffering. Power relinquished, humiliation and pain embraced, death on a cross; not as they expected, but as God willed. Not a king on earth, a commander of human armies, overthrowing Roman oppressors, justifying the house of Israel before those who occupied the Promised Land; The Lord who came offering transformation of life through love, service and submission to the suffering in obeying the will of the Father. On that Saturday, the disciples were baptized into the suffering of waiting for the will of God. When circumstances were seemingly conquered, they feared, they agonized, they were overwhelmed and they came face to face with their hope in their own expectation dissolving. They embraced confusion, disillusionment and isolation; imagine this group of men who had seen miracles, broken bread and been sent out in the name of Christ and yet were now stricken with the chaos of expectation and hope dashed upon the rocks in the storm, without their Savior in the boat to calm the waters. And yet God knew Sunday morning was only around the corner. The same hands which awoke in the boat to silence the storm, would rise again to render death powerless. That Sunday morning was not as they expected; it was far greater and overflowing with the power of God than they would ever expect, just as He willed. It is God’s knowledge of his will being fulfilled which calls his people to be still and know his control amidst the chaos. Chaos when we focus on the waves of the storm, madness when we look to our own power, confusion when we rely on our own reason and anarchy when we anxiously interpret experiences through a self-centered existence.

These Easter Saturday periods of our lives ebb and flow in the experiences of all people and all generations. The highs and lows of David, Joseph, Abraham, Moses, you and me; the human creation of the Lord Almighty face moments of silence, confusion, distraction and anxiety. We can’t understand, we don’t see the purpose and we have no direction, when we view our lives centric to ourselves. Submission to his timing forces us to re-center our hope on Him. We are stripped of our systems of security and expectation; with no where to go but our refuge and source of restoration in the One True God. In these times He stretches us out of ourselves and refocuses our perspective in being drawn closer to Him. We see the truth about our lives: They are about Him. We see Him beyond the perspective of the momentary. We experience a God who gives us an eternity with Him and the blessings which only He can bring.

The scattered and suffering disciples had no idea what would come with the rolling away of the stone; a risen Lord who was changing them from followers to leaders. A Redeemer, who knew a denying Peter, yet commissioned him to shepherd his flock. A Master who know the doubts of Thomas and let him feel the restoration of his confidence with his fingers. They gathered in the room with fear, seeking each others wisdom; yet the risen Lord came to them and showed them a view of the Almighty God who sees his creation outside time and space. A Lord who sees his creation through the light of his will. The Lord who knows the resurrection is coming amidst the overshadowing of the crucifixion. He can see the parting of the red seas concurrent with the chasing chariots, the entry to the Promised Land in the wandering in the wilderness, and the incarnation of Christ at the failure of Adam and Eve; He can see the glory of eternity overcoming the breakdown of today. The God of the Ages blesses us not as we expect, loves us beyond what we deserve, knows us in ways we do not understand and has a plan which is perfect in ways which transcend the finite limitations of our humanity. In our waiting we come face to face with suffering and hope; suffering which leads us to seek the provision of a faithful Father and hope in the promises which He has given to care for us in every season of our lives. The compassionate Lord listens to our burdens as we cry out to Him. He holds us near his heart in our stretching moments. He gathers his trusting children to his arms and blesses them with his love which knows their intimate needs. He knows our wishes and desires and calls for our reliance and obedience as we wait for his fulfillment. We must be still and know He is God.

We must stop trying to figure everything out and know that the Sovereign Lord of the Universe is in control. Too many times we spend our time knowing our options, our fears, our dreams, our disappointments, our demands and our timetables; yet we so not focus on knowing Him. Another translation uses these words of the Lord, “Cease striving, and know that I am God. Stop racing about, trying to understand, trying to be pro-active, trying to master all circumstances; know that He is Almighty God and He has brought you to a place where you will find Him. He is waiting for you to seek Him amidst the middle, that He may show you Himself and his desires for you. There are things to be learned in the waiting: Bob Hope learned to dance, the disciples learned the power of a Risen Lord, Abraham learned that God is faithful, and we learn our dependence upon his provision. He is in control. His will is not to give us control, but to reveal the safety and freedom of his provision within his omnipotent control. His goal is not to give us the knowledge and insight into everything that He is doing, but rather reveal the peace and confidence of resting in his omniscient discernment. His desire is not to change his world according to our longings, but reveal a world which is changed by a likening of peoples hearts to his, experiencing his omnipresence deep within ourselves, our desires, our circumstances and in our reliance upon his faithfulness. This is the Lord who leads his people. Deuteronomy 31:8 says, “The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” He is in control. He is leading you. He is with you.

Waiting. We’re all waiting for something. We are all waiting because God’s desire is for us to seek Him, and waiting stretches us to the place where we recognize that we are reliant upon the Father. We’re not waiting to muster the ability to change our own circumstances, or provide our own path to security and self-sufficiency; we are waiting for the faithfulness of the Father to abundantly give beyond expectation, that we may be bonded to Him and obedient to his will. Likewise, He is waiting. He is waiting for us to acknowledge our inability to survive without Him. He is waiting for us to know his nearness to our hearts. He is waiting that we would be changed by Him; not as we expect, but as He wills. He gives us the middle, the Saturday’s, to prepare us for what lays ahead. When He appears, his faithfulness will shine like the noonday sun and we will praise Him. And we will be transformed in the waiting. Not as we expect; but as He wills.